I am in an amazing relationship and I am so happy to have found someone I can truly be myself with. Our sex life is great; I rarely orgasm through penetrative sex which we discuss, and he always ensures that I orgasm another way, usually before he does. I know he genuinely loves me and I love him but I find this situation very frustrating. Am I being really selfish?
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Most men have to wait a considerable amount of time before they can get things going again. In men and women, this is called the refractory period. With some confidence, Rowland says refractory periods usually last a minimum of 30 to 40 minutes for most men, but the upper end of the spectrum is open. Part of the issue here is that this is difficult to test. It would require a man to have an orgasm and then attempt to do it again as soon as possible.
The Multiple-Orgasm Man: How Men Reduce Time Between Orgasms
Speaking as a male, I can't think of anything that remotely equals the thrill of an orgasm. What's weird is that, for all the attention it receives, the male orgasm doesn't get talked about in much detail despite the fact that there can be a huge difference in intensity from one to the next. My guess is that the most women don't know this. With this information gap in mind, I set out to discover what, exactly, makes for the most bone-rattling, foundation-shaking male orgasms, and what women can do to encourage their arrival. I went straight to the experts — a few sex therapists , lots of men.
For many women, the correlation between sex and snoring is one of those annoying facts of life: no matter when passionate encounters occur, men always seem to fall asleep immediately afterwards. So in lieu of a cure, a better explanation will have to do. Although women sometimes feel sleepy after sex, the phenomenon does seem more pronounced in men. What is it, then, that spirals them into the land of nod? Then there is the biochemistry of the orgasm itself.